Fall Dance Not So Fun?
Fall Dance Not So Fun?
Stress is a very common theme for the students of SHA. Between sports, homework, and tests, SHA girls are constantly in action. As school starts, students are not only preparing for the upcoming academic year but more importantly in some eyes, the Fall Dance. Amongst the SHA girls, the Fall Dance is one of the biggest events of the year – between dresses and pictures, minds are constantly consumed with planning. For many girls, the fall dance is exciting but can overwhelm many.
When discussing the Fall Dance with classmates, the majority seemed enthusiastic in regards to the event, but also very anxious. One main source of stress is due to bringing a date. Although dates are no longer required, many girls still feel as if there is a stigma: if one friend is bringing a date, others will not want to go alone in order to prevent exclusion.
When asked about this situation, one student gave her opinion in regards to bringing a date and how it affects a community of females: “Yes, there is a stigma attached because you’re seen as a loner if you don’t bring someone. It is ironic that a place that mentors and nourishes young women to be strong and independent is the same place that is pressuring [the idea] to have to bring a date.” The idea that on top of the stress of finding a date, the very idea of having a date does not necessarily give a strong message for independence upon young women. However, this student was not the only one to feel this way, as when approaching many other girls, all from different clubs, activities, and even friend groups, many had a similar answer.
Perhaps, as an empowering action for students, the permission of not needing a date should emphasized in a greater way. After reflection and observation, the question of “Who are you bringing to the dance?” is incredibly more common to hear in the halls rather than, “Are you bringing anyone to the dance?” This stigma is often brushed over, but when truly thinking about it, the subject of bringing a date is in fact something so little, but is drawn into something so important.
Building off the issue of having a date for formal, another common source of stress, is the fear of judgement and lack of self-assurance. When approaching a student, who compared to most is not going to be in attendance, she explained that the situation overall is too overwhelming: “Although some people find that scene fun, it causes me unnecessary stress and I would most likely feel uncomfortable- my ideal evening would be staying in [at home] with a few friends. The stress of finding a date and judgments towards who it is or what your dress looks like or your makeup looks like is overwhelming.” This student was not afraid to express her true feelings about the dance and, once again, is not the only student who feels this way.
Despite all the stress that consumes SHA students, the Fall Dance is an event that is meant for fun and overall, a good time. For many SHA girls, the concept of relaxing is not often looked upon, especially in the case of the dance. However, the Fall Dance is an opportunity for girls to dress up, be with friends, create memories, and loosen up. As the event approaches, stress will rise, but it is important for the girls to not let all the planning take over and ruin their time leading up to and including the dance.
anonymous • Nov 4, 2019 at 5:48 pm
There are a number of issues with this article. First, the fall dance is optional. If planning and preparing for the dance is too much for a student to handle, she can opt out of attending. Secondly, I would argue that the fall dance is actually a relief from stress. Personally, I believe that the dance is something to look forward to and it provides a break from feeling stressed and overloaded with homework, quizzes, and tests. Any real stress from the dance is most likely self-imposed. Things like the SHA formal dresses instagram account and searching far and wide for a date are extraneous to the occasion and are not necessary. Lastly, this article is poorly written. It speaks of widespread stress among SHA students, but provides no quotes or concrete evidence showing that the majority of students are actually stressed.
reasonable person • Nov 4, 2019 at 4:08 pm
I don’t understand why everyone is getting upset over this, especially with the argument that STUCO puts a lot of work into it when feedback like this is the only thing that is going to improve school events. Of course she’s not saying that the dance should be put to an end. All she’s saying is that some aspects of it cause students stress, which is just undeniably true. Good article, Juliet.
Anonymous • Nov 4, 2019 at 1:53 pm
I feel as though this article shines a negative light on this fun event. The fact that there is no mention as to all of the hard work STUCO put into the night itself is disheartening. This article is just way too vague. There are definitely people who would rather stay at home then go out at night, and that’s okay. If their friends make them feel badly for not going, maybe they need to find some new friends. As a senior, I have always enjoyed the dance, and have never felt like anyone was forced into bringing a date, even when it was “mandatory” Sister Kathleen was always more than understanding with allowing people to go alone. I think you owe STUCO Executive Board a serious apology, they worked so hard to make sure we all had fun. I know I did.
anonymous • Nov 4, 2019 at 1:44 pm
This article is very misleading in my opinion. The fall dance is the highlight of October for many. Maybe some students take it too seriously, but it wouldn’t be fair not to have it because we enjoy it. Lets be real we’re sha girls, we stress over most things, better yet we are girls we worry about appearance, and what people think or say. It is not just the fall dance it is every teenage girl. Some people have different versions of fun, and that is fine. However, if you find it so stressful simply don’t go. The comment of the whole date thing is totally irrational. Since when are we loners? Since when does having a date define you? I appreciate the concern for our anxiety and stress, but an article like this is totally bias, and this doesn’t give the student body a voice. This shouldn’t be based off a few girls, but school wide. I also feel like this is totally ungrateful. Do you know how hard everyone worked to make this fun for us, STUCO especially. Teachers gave up their nights for this. The dance isn’t mandatory so if this is really your opinion, just dont go, but dont label it as something it not.
Mrs. Vitale • Nov 1, 2019 at 11:19 am
To be clear, the Fall Dance is not being eliminated. However, we will examine it further. Watch for a survey in the near future. 🙂
Anonymous • Oct 31, 2019 at 11:45 am
With all due respect, I disagree with the formal dance being as stressful as many see it as. The Fall Dance is supposed to be a fun event and it is natural for us to stress a bit about this event. However, this stress is not a negative kind of stress. I believe that getting rid of this event that many look forward to is a bit excessive. I agree that everyone’s opinion matters but if the majority of the student body is actually looking forward and is excited about this event, I do not see why the whole event should be completely gotten rid of. I know many people who look forward to this event this year, especially freshmen who look forward to this event sophomore year. The majority of my friends went alone and without a date and were completely okay with it and had a fun time. Since this article was write before formal, I think that without experiencing the fun of the night, concluding that the night would be stressful and not worth the time is not true at all. Also, if this event is stressful for anyone because of finding a date, hair, or makeup, it would be best for them not to attend because attending the dance just to be included with your friends just to have a bad night is not worth going to. However this does not mean for everyone to miss out on such a fun-planned event.
anon • Oct 31, 2019 at 11:28 am
From a sophomore student perspective, I would be upset if SHA eliminated the fall dance. I believe I can speak for many when I say this was the highlight of October. I think this article was written to just bring awareness to the common things some people may run into before formal. Yes, it is a bit stressful, but so is every dance, homecoming, prom, etc… (Not to mention the fact that this dance and bringing a date is OPTIONAL) I believe the title of this article was misleading, and the points made were completely overblown. The students and staff on STUCO did a great job organizing the dance, and I know I had a really fun time. I would be a bit aggravated to see this event dismissed in the following years. Please don’t eliminate it!
Anonymous • Oct 30, 2019 at 7:51 am
I disagree with several points this article makes, but I find these to be the major issues:
– This was written before the dance even occurred. It would have been more effective to publish this after the dance so students could give reliable opinions on the experience. It is difficult to comment on an event that has not yet happened.
– The student’s point about an “ideal night at home” is arguably irrelevant. Her opinion is, of course, valid. Regardless, if she feels her value depends solely on the opinions of others, she is undervaluing her own worth. She should not feel that the dance is her only opportunity to increase her self-confidence.
– The phrase “many students” implies a significant portion of the student body; however, responses have been overwhelmingly positive. There are always little things that can be tweaked so next year’s experience can be even better, but most students have reported they enjoyed a fun evening with their friends.
– If a friend group is pressuring a particular member into bringing a date, that suggests there is an underlying issue in that specific group that should be addressed. Everyone should respect one another’s wishes, including whether or not they want to bring a date.
– Dates were optional this year. “Although dates are no longer required, many girls still feel as if there is a stigma: if one friend is bringing a date, others will not want to go alone in order to prevent exclusion.” This is framed as though there was division in the school over the matter where there was none. In fact, the students I’ve spoken to who did not bring dates did not give any indication that they felt excluded.
– The idea that bringing a date undermines the school’s mission to encourage female empowerment could not be further from the truth. Inviting a male companion to a semi-formal dance is traditional at many schools outside of SHA. “‘It is ironic that a place that mentors and nourishes young women to be strong and independent is the same place that is pressuring [the idea] to have to bring a date.’” The idea that on top of the stress of finding a date, the very idea of having a date does not necessarily give a strong message for independence upon young women.” If this point is going to be reiterated throughout the piece, it should be elaborated on. Why does bringing a date subtract from nourishing independence? The students that chose to bring a date did not seem to feel as though it was an attack upon their value as women.
– It should be acknowledged that the STUCO executive board put a lot of effort into making this a fun experience. They took time out of their days to visit the Aquaturf so they could plan the menu and the decorations. They spent four days selling tickets at break to the senior, junior, and sophomore classes. (If that seems trivial, consider this: there are eight members of the STUCO executive board and roughly three hundred students from those three grade levels.) Although it would counter the point of this article, it is respectful to acknowledge that your peers in the student body devoted quite a bit of their time into planning the fall dance.
Sandra D'Ambrosio (Ms. D) • Oct 29, 2019 at 4:30 pm
First, I would like to thank the STUCO executive board for a job well done! This week has been full of wonderful comments about the food, the DJ, the dancing, and the great time everyone had. I’ve been the STUCO co moderator for 15 years, and have chaperoned the Fall Dance each of those years. It has always been a great event that the girls look forward to. Having worked at SHA for 24 years, I know it is the nature off teens to “stress” over things…mixers, dances, outfits, tests, etc. Hopefully, we are helping them to look at these things in the right perspective. This year, girls were allowed to come to the Fall Dance without a date. Two hundred forty-two (242) girls came, and more than half came without a date. They had a ball! I am sorry if some people look at the negative side of the event (stress), but thanks to all who attended and had a great time.
Again, congrats STUCO on a job well done!
anonymous • Oct 29, 2019 at 7:55 am
I have asked multiple students their view on this topic. We feel as though people are not forced to go, or even forced to bring someone. Although a few people feel this way it is definitely not the overall feeling and if girls found it stressful then they could easily not go. I think most of the stress placed on the dance is the girls stressing themselves out and it has nothing to do with the dance its self. I also think this article hates on the dance that STUCO worked so hard on and I believe they deserve credit for all they did.
Mrs. Vitale • Oct 28, 2019 at 7:25 pm
I actually find this article disturbing. The headline, in particular, was alarming. I will discuss with Administration the idea of eliminating the dance. The dance is meant to be fun, not stressful.